Always There

  Today is one of those days.  "God...I can't do this".  "I can't make this work, I can't get my relationship with you right".  "I try....but I am always one step behind."  "I missed my study time this morning....my prayer time is fragmented....I give things to you just to take them back."  "I am so frustrated...I am just not feeling you, Lord."  " I know what you say....I know you are always with me...you're not dictated by my feelings....I know you're always good and that you are for me, not against me....I just can't "feel" that today."  I hate feelings.  They're so fickle....never to be relied on....but feeling close to you is such a good feeling.
  Today is one of those days.  You're response to me, so typical.  You are God and You alone are good.  No, I am not alone.  No, I never was alone.  And despite my inadequacies, despite my failures, you continue to love me.  You continue to lift me up.  I see you all around me, I just have to look.....You are everywhere.
  You care about the littlest of my concerns and the biggest concerns are also big to you.  I can't forget that. 
  Today is one of those days.  Last week I lost something of great importance to me.  I thought it was gone.  I spent time in prayer over it.  "Lord, it may seem little in your eyes, but you know its big to me".   Well, I pulled my car into work this afternoon and "my" spot was occupied....so I parked in a spot I never park in....a ways from my "usual" spot.  I spent my drive praying, "Lord, why?"  "Why can't I find this?"  "I really need this".   I get out of my car and directly behind my car was the object of importance.   Sitting quietly on the pavement behind my car was a lonely piece of paper......MY PIECE OF PAPER!   I never park in this spot....how did it get here?  God............that's all I need to say.   Thank you.  I may not be able to feel you, but you are there....and you were all along.

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
 Jeremiah 29:13

Fulfilled

A young woman.

Met “The Fulfiller” and rested completely in

His arms.

She wanted nothing.

For He was “The Provider”.

He knew her from within for He created her.

She was known.  Completely.  Thoroughly.

She was loved:

        To a depth her heart couldn’t comprehend.

She was treasured.  Found Precious.

She was desired.  She was pursued.

In His arms, she was complete.  She lacked nothing.

She was fulfilled.

In the arms of Him…..Her Everything……

   The I Am.

 

 

 

 

 

Love and Perseverance

She watches the nest....momma bird....tending the babes....

she watches....In hope.....

 

 

She listens for the sound of chirping.....

She stands out on the porch each morning.....

waiting.....listening.....

 

But something happens. 

The mama bird quits attending her nest.

Something detains her...

to the heartbreak of the little girl.

1 day.

2 days.

No mama bird.

 

But the little girl still waits....hoping.

 

Day 3 she can stand it no longer.

 

Carefully removing the nest.

She loving holds each egg in her fingers.

She knows they weren't meant to be.

 

She can't help but try.

She can't give up.

 

So she ventures to the coop.

To her feathered backyard friends.....

Just to try.

 

If maybe....maybe....

one might be willing.

 

 

She places her blue pearls under another

willing mama.

To wait it out and see.

 

Not willing to give up.

 

We explain to her that the chicks are already gone,

but she is determined.

 

Love her.

My tender girl.

-----------------------------------------------

My mothers' heart watches and takes it in......

Thank you Lord for my daughter.

 

And I guess I am reminded and

I am glad God has yet even more determination.

He doesn't give up on me.

I am a work in progress:

I doubt.

Struggle to trust Him.

I get distracted.

I make mistakes.

I fail.

But unlike her blue pearls,

If we're walking this earth,

we're not too far gone yet.

God renews

He restores.

He forgives.

and

He

Loves.

 

 

 I am so thankful for that.

 

Isaiah 40:30-31

Though youth grow weary and tired, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

 

In His Love,

Candis